The best weddings don't follow a template—they tell a story. Your story. Intentional wedding planning is about making deliberate choices that honor your relationship, your values, and the people you love most. This approach transforms wedding planning from a stressful checklist into a meaningful process of creating a celebration that will feel just as authentic in 20 years as it does today. Ready to plan a wedding that actually feels like you?

What is Intentional Wedding Planning?

Intentional wedding planning isn't about following trends or checking boxes. It's about creating a day that actually feels like you.

When you plan with intention, you focus on what matters to you both. This means your wedding becomes a true celebration of your relationship, not just a cookie-cutter event.

For couples in their 30s, this approach makes perfect sense. You know who you are. You've lived enough to understand what you value. Your wedding should reflect that wisdom.

Quick Tip: Before making any wedding decisions, ask yourselves: "Will this choice feel authentic to us in 20 years?"

Planning with intention helps you:

Spend money on things you truly care about
Create genuine moments your guests will remember
Feel present and connected on your wedding day
Look back without regrets

Many couples tell me they wish they'd focused less on pleasing others and more on what felt right for them. Your wedding is a rare chance to gather everyone you love in one place. Make it count!

When you build your celebration around your shared values and story, something amazing happens - you end up with a wedding you'll actually love, not just one you hope others will approve of.

Start With Your Wedding Vision

Before you jump into picking colors or venues, take time to build a clear wedding vision together. This is about more than just pretty details. It's about what you want your day to feel like.

Create Your Shared Vision Statement

Sit down with your partner and talk about what matters most to you both. A vision statement doesn't need to be fancy. It can be simple:

"We want a relaxed day in nature where our closest people can celebrate with good food and dancing."

Questions to Ask Each Other

Having trouble getting started? Try these questions:

What three feelings do we want on our wedding day?
When we look back in 20 years, what will make us happy we did?
What parts of weddings we've been to did we love or dislike?
How can our wedding show who we are as a couple?

Defining What "Meaningful" Means

"Meaningful" looks different for every couple. For some, it might be:

Including family traditions that matter to you
Creating space for quiet moments together during the day
Writing personal vows that tell your story
Saying private vows as well as public vows
Including food that connects to your heritage or relationship

Take notes during these talks. They'll help you make choices later when you face the many wedding planning decisions ahead.

Setting Your Wedding Priorities

When planning your wedding, not everything can be top priority. Knowing what matters most helps you make better choices with your time and money.

Start with Your Top 3-5 Elements

What parts of your wedding are most important to you both? Common priorities include:

A venue with a story
Quality photography to capture memories
Good food and drinks
Live music or entertainment
Meaningful ceremony elements
Guest comfort and experience

Quick Tip: Sit down together and each write your top 3 priorities without discussing first. Then compare lists to see where you align or differ.

Budget Based on What Matters

Once you know what's most important, give those elements more of your budget. If food is a priority, you might spend 30-40% of your budget there, while cutting back on less important areas.

Here's a simple way to think about it:

High priority = Willing to spend more than average
Medium priority = Standard budget allocation
Low priority = Minimal spending or DIY options

What You Can Skip or Scale Back

Be honest about what you don't care about! Many couples find they can skip or simplify:

Fancy invitations or save-the-dates
Elaborate decor or centerpieces
Wedding favors
Photography (Yup! I said it. You can have your guests capture iPhone moments instead. It all depends on what you value.)
Large wedding party
Expensive cake (many guests don't eat it!)

Remember, each "no" to something less important makes room for a bigger "yes" to what truly matters to you both.

Boise Train Depot

Tamarack Resort

Cottage at Riverbend

Chateau des Fleurs

Choosing a Meaningful Venue

Finding a venue that clicks with your story makes all the difference. Your wedding spot should feel right, not just look good in photos.

When picking a venue, think about:

Your history together - Did you meet at a coffee shop? Love hiking? Choose a space that connects to your relationship
Your comfort level - Some folks feel at home in a rustic barn, others in a sleek hotel
Guest experience - Will your loved ones enjoy being there? Does it logistically make sense for the guests who are attending?
Practical needs - Think parking, bathrooms, and weather backup plans

Idaho has some amazing spots for couples who want a place with character. From mountain views to urban charm, the top wedding venues in Idaho offer something for every couple.

Before you sign anything, ask:

"Can we make this space our own?"
"What's included in the rental fee?"
"How much time do we get for setup?"
"Are there any rules about decor or music?"
"Can we bring our own vendors?"

The right venue feels like an extension of you two. When you walk in, you should be able to picture your day unfolding there. Trust that gut feeling!

Curating Your Guest Experience

Your wedding isn't just about you, it's about the people you love, too. A guest list with 20 close friends feels very different from one with 200 acquaintances.

Focus on who truly matters:

Pick guests who know and support your relationship
Don't invite people out of obligation
Consider a smaller guest count for more quality time

When you invite fewer guests, you can spend real time with each person. No more "I barely saw anyone at my own wedding" regrets!

Think about how guests will experience your day:

Are they comfortable?
Can they connect with others?
Will they feel welcomed and valued?

Pro Tip: Create a "guest journey map" from arrival to departure, looking for ways to add thoughtful touches.

Small details make big impressions. A welcome note, comfortable seating, or good signage shows you care. Even better—include personal touches that tell your story as a couple.

Remember: The best weddings feel like "you." When guests leave saying "that was so them," you've done it right.

Building a Vendor Team That Gets You

Finding vendors who truly understand your vision makes all the difference in your wedding day. When your team gets you, they can bring your ideas to life without constant direction.

The right vendors don't just provide services, they become partners in creating your day. Here's how to build that dream team:

Look Beyond Portfolios

Watch how they communicate - Do they listen more than they talk?
Notice their questions - Good vendors ask about your relationship, not just your color scheme
Check their responsiveness - Quick replies show they value your time

Key Questions to Ask Potential Vendors

"Have you worked with couples with similar priorities before?"
"What's your approach to handling unexpected changes?"
"How do you help couples stay true to their vision?"
"Can you tell me about a time you helped make a wedding more personal?"

Signs They're the Right Fit

Look for vendors who:

Get excited about your unique ideas
Suggest options aligned with your values
Have backup plans that still honor your vision
Set clear boundaries about what they can deliver

Remember, the best vendor relationships feel like partnerships. When your team understands what matters to you, they'll make choices that support your vision—even when you're not there to guide them.

Mindful Wedding Day Timeline

Your wedding day should feel like you, not a rush from one thing to the next. Most couples tell me their day flew by too fast. A thoughtful timeline helps you slow down and enjoy it.

The Problem With Standard Timelines:

Too packed with activities
No room for spontaneous moments
Little time to connect with each other
Barely any time to eat or drink

A good timeline gives you space to breathe. Think of it as planning pockets of calm during your celebration.

3 Ways to Build a Better Timeline:

Add buffer time - Plan 15-30 minutes between main events. Things often run late, and this extra time keeps you calm.
Consider a first look - Meeting before the ceremony gives you private time together and makes the day feel less rushed. Still want that timeless first look moment at the ceremony? Add some “just-for-you” time after the ceremony. 10-15 minutes really does make the biggest difference for your memories.
Plan for sunset photos - Schedule 15 minutes during golden hour. This gives you a break from the party and creates gorgeous photos.

Pro Tip: Share your timeline with your wedding party and family. When everyone knows what's happening and when, you won't be answering questions all day.

Remember to eat! Block out real time for your meal, not just a few bites between conversations.

The goal isn't to fit in every tradition but to create a day where you can be fully present. Your guests will notice and appreciate your calm presence too.

Personal Touches That Matter

Adding your own personal touches to your wedding isn't just nice, it's what makes your day truly yours. When you look back at photos years later, these details will bring back the best memories.

Ceremonies That Feel Like You

Your ceremony should sound and feel like your relationship. Consider these ideas:

Write your own vows using simple, honest words
Include a reading from a book that means something to both of you
Add a ritual that fits your story (like planting a tree or mixing sands)

Creating New Traditions

You don't need to stick to what's always been done. Try these approaches:

Blend family traditions from both sides
Start something brand new that fits who you are as a couple
Skip traditions that don't feel right for you

Quick Tip: Keep a small notebook during planning to jot down ideas that feel special to you both.

Including Loved Ones

There are many ways to include important people beyond the typical roles:

Ask a close friend to do a reading or play music
Display photos of relatives who have passed away
Have family members contribute a special skill (like baking or flower arranging)
Incorporate at Flower Grandma or Beer Boy trend

The best personal touches aren't the fanciest—they're the ones that make guests say, "That was so them." When planning these details, ask yourselves: "Will this still feel meaningful to us in 20 years?"

FAQ: Intentional Wedding Planning

Planning a wedding that feels true to you comes with questions. Here are answers to common concerns about intentional wedding planning:

How early should we start planning an intentional wedding?

Most couples benefit from 9-12 months of planning time. This gives you space to think through decisions rather than rushing them. If you want special vendors who book up fast, start even earlier. But remember - shorter engagements can work too! They often force you to focus on what truly matters.

What if our families have different expectations?

This happens to almost every couple! Try these steps:

Listen fully to family wishes without immediately saying no
Identify which requests are most important to them
Share your vision clearly and why certain choices matter to you
Look for creative compromises where possible
Set clear boundaries when needed

Remember that your wedding reflects your relationship, not everyone else's ideas.

How do we stay true to ourselves while pleasing others?

Start by getting super clear on your non-negotiables as a couple. Pick your 3-5 most important elements and stand firm on those. For everything else, be open to input and compromise. When family or friends push for something, ask yourselves: "Will this add to or take away from the day we want?" This simple question helps cut through the noise.

If you’re still struggling, I love using the 10, 10, 10 technique. How will I feel about this decision in 10 minutes, 10 months and 10 years from now.

What elements can we skip without regret?

Many couples find they can skip without missing:

A giant or trendy venue
Formal wedding party if it feels stressful
Garter and bouquet tosses
Matching bridal party clothes
Favors guests often leave behind
Extra desserts beyond the cake
Programs (a sign works just as well!)

The best rule: if something doesn't feel meaningful or fun to you, it's probably fine to skip it.

Capturing Your Intentional Wedding

Your wedding photos will be with you long after the cake is eaten and the dance floor empties. When you plan with intention, you'll want images that truly show who you are as a couple.

Documentary wedding photography catches real moments rather than just staged poses. Think of it as the difference between a scripted movie and a beautiful documentary - one feels forced while the other reveals truth.

I focus on:

Genuine emotions - those tearful smiles, belly laughs, and quiet glances
Unplanned moments - the spontaneous hug from grandma or your best friend's reaction during toasts
The little details you carefully chose to represent your story

My couples tell me they barely noticed me working throughout their day. I stay in the background, which lets you:

Stay fully present with each other
Connect deeply with your guests
Experience your wedding rather than perform it

Many photographers will rush you through a shot list. I take a different approach. While we'll get those family photos you need, I make sure you have breathing room to actually enjoy the day you spent months planning.

The best wedding photos happen when you're relaxed and being yourselves. That's when the magic shows up in your images.

Ready to plan a wedding that truly reflects who you are? I'd love to be your photographer! Contact me here